morning rambles

This morning I had a thought.

It was a pretty standard morning for me. What used to seem like the great unknown of a new neighborhood and space, now feels comforting and peaceful. I pulled up the blinds to let what little winter light there was in, got ready, buttoned up, settled on an album to listen to and walked to the subway. My subway stop is above ground and goes over the WIlliamsburg Bridge. It's one of the best ways to start the day. I stood on the platform with my headphones in, gloves on, waiting for the train when I thought about my upcoming birthday. I ran down a list of sorts.

27. Female. Single. Average Height, Average Weight. Never been married. No Children. Can touch my toes. Cannot do a handstand (yet). Happy, yes.. I am happy. Brooklyn, New York. Blonde. Black boots. Overall comfortable.

And then I thought, how many of those things will change once I'm 28. How many will change in 5 years, 10 years. I remembered turning 27 and thinking about the year ahead but predicting nothing that had happened. There were some amazing things that happened and then there were some that I would have liked to fast-forward through but maybe not. 27 was a year of growing pains. Maybe it's a superstition but that odd number always did seem challenging to me and it did prove itself to be. I gained friends, I lost friends. I let go. I moved, twice. I ate too much then too little. Changed teams at work, changed again.

Someone recently asked me how I am.

"I'm well. I feel good. I'm trying to push myself a little more. Speak up, challenge myself. Go outside my comfort zone and be more daring."

They probably were just wondering if I was in a good or bad mood but hey, you asked.

Usually I make a list or goal for the year ahead when my birthday comes around. This year there won't be one. I want to live. I want to experience everything that comes my way. I want to open myself to everything that is coming. To not grip. To not wish and want but to be. Be happy and then be sad and then be happy again. Whatever comes will no matter what. I can't wait. 

Photo by Kate Diago

where have you been

I'm such a hypocrite sometimes. There are a few blogs that I follow that I check, recheck and refresh and when there hasn't been anything updated for more than say, a day or so… it really bugs me. Yet here I am typing away and I haven't been updating suddenly lovely at all. Hopefully those of you who check back every once and a while haven't removed me from your bookmarks and care to know that I'm still here. 

I was away for a week in Florida. Enough sun and warmth to carry me through the rest of the 'winter' (I suppose technically it's spring). It was great but I was so happy to get back to NYC. I love the beach and water but at the end of the day, I love Manhattan more. I rode my bike down Metropolitan Avenue in Williamsburg smiling ear to ear. I went to yoga, stopped by Marlow and Sons for a honey scone and coffee and rode the rest of the way home not even minding the cold.

I've been working on freelance. I've been lucky enough to work with several awesome people who have shared their weddings, babies and bat mitzvahs with me. The best part is handing over the final piece and seeing their faces get all goofy and excited. Get goofy, it's such an awesome feeling.

I am back to running. I joined a gym and try to go after work during the week and at least once on the weekend. I was starting to drive myself crazy when I got home from work and all I would talk about was work and what was going well or more likely, not well. I could hear myself blabbing and just couldn't stop. Now going to the gym I get it out of my system by physically exhausting my emotional self. At the end of the day, it's just perfume and makeup.

One last note before I sign off and probably head to bed. I received the most lovely cards from friends this past birthday. For those of you who sent me little notes, thank you from the bottom of my heart.

no place like home

I moved to New York City the summer of 2008. After graduation and a month or so of pool hopping and waitressing I took a job, found an apartment and never looked back. You hear different stories about people's first year or so living in the city. Going out until 5 am and spending the next day swearing you'll never do that again until you forget you have a birthday party or promised a friend you'd meet them for drinks. Working hard - 10 and sometimes 12 hour days because you feel like it's a rite of passage living here. Getting on the wrong train, meeting the most random people and spending way too much on cabs. You know what I remember the most though, being absolutely broke.

I had a roof over my head and clean clothes but that was only because I knew which deli had the cheapest ramen and yogurt. I ate a lot of eggs and toast to say the least but through all of it, I can't say that I never thought that enough was enough. I loved it here, I still love it here. Every paycheck felt like a blessing and while it was a bit of a struggle, much like the days spent working well into the night, it was another NYC rite of passage to me.

This city puts you through it's own fleet of tests. Even now when the temperatures have been hovering around 10 degrees with the occasional snowfall, I smile every time I walk through Madison Square Park. I cried in Whole Foods in Chelsea when I received my job offer. I fell in love, literally in the Empire State Building. Sometimes I think that little bit of hunger made me work that much harder to stay. Because even though this city can chew you up and spit you back out hungover, tired and overworked, it's breathtaking every time I walk down the street. I wouldn't want to be anywhere else. This is my home.

that's a wrap

As the year wraps up so am I. All of my projects seem to be coming to a close at work (new ones on their way no doubt), I'm crossing off errands and year long to-do lists are getting shorter and shorter. Even my Christmas shopping is near complete, something that never usually begins until about December 15th. I've shared so much on suddenly lovely that I feel that a change in my life should be somewhat ceremonially put into words and up on the blog. I am physically wrapping up everything I own, I am moving to Brooklyn.

A little over a year ago I wrote about my then current roommate's decision to move out of our cozy 2 bedroom upper west side apartment to an apartment where her and her boyfriend would share the space. Looking back at what I had wrote, I can assure you that I've become one of those absolutely crazy s.o.b.'s that claim "when you know you know." Because now I know and guess what, it's true that another borough has enough room to house both our physical and emotional space.

My first ever apartment (student housing for a summer internship) was in Brooklyn Heights right off the Clark Street stop on the 2, 3. I loved everything about that neighborhood. I was scared to death to use the subway, spent Saturday and Sunday mornings along the water just admiring New York City and it became a definite reason why I returned to the city once I graduated college. Coming up on 4 years of working in NYC I am thrilled to be returning to Brooklyn of a new neighborhood. East Williamsburg is an up and coming neighborhood which I've come to love and will soon call home.

I currently reside in a smallish 2 bedroom apartment on the upper west side. I say smallish because to anyone unaware of the typical/affordable NYC apartment, my place is hellishly small but to someone more aware of the apartment situation in the city and the absurd rent then my apartment isn't so bad. I live a block from Central Park and the American History Museum. I am chatty with my neighbors, my grocery store clerks, the trainers at my gym, the supers on my entire block and the bodega owner. I've been there for 2 years now which is just long enough for me to soak up all that I can of the neighborhood. Plus, in moving to Brooklyn I gain a private deck with so much potential for a garden.

More so than the garden, I gain the experience of living with my significant other. Both of us being designers means we can equally geek out at the wonderful studio space we are setting up in the second bedroom. As we combine our things and bring the apartment to life I can't help but look back at the space between and wonder who that was writing the post. Who knew so much could happen in a year. Maybe in 12 months I'll be looking back at this post and wondering the same thing. Time will tell. Hello Brooklyn.