over the loudspeaker

There is not one person I know that isn't going through some sort of challenge in their life this year.

Before I hit "post" I usually ask myself why I'm writing what I am and why I am sharing it publicly. Some of you may feel that some information would be better kept private or within a relationship, friendship, family, etc. The truth of the matter is, every time I put myself out there it has the potential of reaching someone else who is going through a challenge in their own lives.

Maybe you've come here to look at a recipe, to stalk me a little, to get to know what's going on in my head or simply by mistake. Or maybe you come back because I'm here saying that sometimes shit is really fucked up and that makes you feel a little bit better.

To everyone who has ever sent me messages about the blog, thank you for reading. For those who haven't, thank you too for reading and sticking it out with me. Much love going into the weekend.

plagued plans

I book, double book, cancel and reschedule constantly. I get into bed Sunday night and wish I had spent my weekend resting and running errands instead of going out to eat, staying out much too late and not sleeping nearly enough. Does anyone else do this to themselves? As soon as I have a free minute I'm filled with this you're-25-and-in-nyc-you-must-go-be-social-your-youth-will-be-gone-soon feeling.

My sister jokes that whenever I am home at my parents that all I do is sleep but this is the only time where I don't have that nagging feeling that I'm missing out on something. I can actually linger around, take random naps and go to bed/sleep in late without feeling like a loser who stayed in on the weekend. I think my non-stop attitude is all apart of my new schedule which flexes me to have a greater social life. I'm trying to use my new freedom to become "healthier" and to let go of all the stress I carried around for the past few years but what I'm really do is making myself crazy with dinners, dates, random travel plans and staying up and out too late.

Speaking of random travel plans, this weekend I'll be returning to my homeland also known as Beaver Stadium. Penn State homecoming is this weekend and I'll be off to pretend that I haven't got a care in the world by cheering on my home team. I can't wait to go back to Saints, shop at Mr. Charles and pick up a college baseball cap. Hoping for nice weather and a win.